When it feels like the world is crashing in...

Today I had the first panic attack that I've had in over a year. Each time it's scary, like the world is crashing in around you. Each time it feels like the air is being grasped in your chest bit by bit until you can no longer inhale a full deep breath.

The physical symptoms may be similar, but with each panic attack my mindset grows stronger than before. While it's happening I acknowledge how scary it is, but I’m also consciously telling myself that I've been through this before & I always persevere. I always catch my breath. And with the energetic release I come out on the other end stronger.

Did it suck? Yes. Was I annoyed it was happening AGAIN? Yes. But now, as I write this, a slight smile comes to my face.

I reflect on all the times in the past that this would have spiraled me into an episode of doubt, questioning my self-worth & purpose. I remind myself of the times when having panic attacks multiple times a week was the norm & just how fucking far I've come since then.

When I look in the mirror & see my puffy eyes I'm reminded of the countless mornings spent trying to cover up all the puffiness with concealer, hoping no one would notice.

I'm reminded of the self-work I’ve done to get to where I am today - a place where I WANT to be noticed. A place where I want to be seen & heard for everything that I am.

A place where I’m fully engaging in life as ME. Not the me I was "trying" so hard to be - but the true, real, raw, honest, loving, smart, confident, fucking badass ME.

It's been a long journey to get to where I am, and the truth is, the self-work never ends. My baseline of existence gets to continue to rise as I go through life, & I think that’s just about the coolest thing in the entire world.

Therapy, coaches, transforming my relationship with my body & food, finding strength from within by not just accepting that my growth comes from all this self-work, but from EMBRACING it with the fieriest passion for aliveness there is.

Today, I am proud. Proud of me and proud of you for being wherever you are in your journey. Sending so much love & gratitude for everyone in my life who has helped me rise into my truest self, now helping others do the same. 💫

xo,

Em